A Nice story

I’m not sure whether this is a true story or not. I’m not sure where it originates from as it was sent to me by a reader. Looking through Snopes it is undetermined.

Airline Lunches

 
I put my carry-on in the luggage compartment and sat down in my assigned seat. It was going to be a long flight from Gatwick. 'I'm glad I have a good book to read Perhaps I will get a short sleep,' I thought.

Just before take-off, a line of British Army Youngsters came down the aisle and filled all the vacant seats, totally surrounding me. I decided to start a conversation.

'Where are you blokes headed?' I asked the Young man seated nearest to me. “Cyprus . We'll be there for two weeks
for special training, and then we're being deployed to Afghanistan” .

After flying for about an hour, an announcement was made that lunches were available for five pounds.
It would be several hours before we reached Cyprus , and I quickly decided a lunch would help pass the time..
As I reached for my wallet, I overheard a soldier ask his mate if he planned to buy lunch.

'No, that seems like a lot of money for just an airline lunch. Probably wouldn't be worth five Quid. I'll wait till we get to Cyprus .....

His mate agreed.

I looked around at the other soldiers. None were buying lunch. I walked to the back of the plane and handed the flight attendant a fifty Pound note. 'Take a lunch to all those soldiers..' She grabbed my arms and squeezed tightly. Her eyes wet with tears, she thanked me. 'My young bloke was a soldier in Iraq , it's almost like you are doing it for him..'

Picking up ten lunchboxes, she headed up the aisle to where the boys were seated. She stopped at my seat and asked, 'Which do you like best - beef or chicken?' 'Chicken,' I replied, wondering why she asked..

She turned and went to the front of plane, returning a minute later with a dinner plate from first class. “This is your thanks.”

After we finished eating, I went again to the back of the plane, heading for the toilet. An old bloke stopped me.
'I saw what you did. I want to be part of it. Here, take this.' He handed me twenty-five Pounds..

Soon after I returned to my seat,  I saw the Captain coming down the aisle, looking at the aisle numbers as he walked, I hoped he wasn't looking for me, but noticed he was looking at the numbers only on my side of the plane.
When he got to my row he stopped, smiled, held out his hand, and said, 'I want to shake your hand.'

Quickly unfastening my seat-belt I stood and took the Captain's hand. With a booming voice he said, 'I was an army pilot a long time back. Once someone bought me lunch. It was an act of kindness I never forgot.'

I was embarrassed when applause was heard from all of the passengers.

Later I walked to the front of the plane so I could stretch my legs. A kid who looked about 18 was sitting about
six rows in front of me reached out his hand, wanting to shake mine. He left another twenty-five Pounds In my palm.

When we landed I gathered my belongings and started to depart.
Waiting just inside the aeroplane door was a man who stopped me, put something in my shirt pocket, turned, and walked away without saying a word. Another twenty-five Pounds!

Upon entering the terminal, I saw the soldiers gathering for their Trip up to there training area..

I walked over to them and handed them seventy-five Pounds. 'It will take you some time to reach your training area. It will be about time for a sandwich. God Bless You Blokes.'

Ten young blokes left that flight feeling the love and respect of their fellow Brits.

As I walked briskly to my car, I whispered a prayer for their safe return. These soldiers were giving their all for our country. I could only give them a couple of meals. It seemed so little...

A British Serviceman is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank  cheque made payable to
' United Kingdom ' for an amount of  'up to and including my life.' That is Honour, and there are way too many foreigners in this country who don't understand it.'

Sniping at Smokers

Here we have another in the long line of attacks on a minority who like to take solace and pleasure in the simple habit of smoking. This article goes, In my view, a touch to far.

This so called Journalist, maybe in jest, but I suspect would dearly love this to be legal, advocates smokers to be shot on sight.

So let’s set a squad of licensed snipers on to the streets, with permission to pick off smokers whenever there’s a clear shot.

I confidently predict that the prospect of having your head blown off while enjoying what you didn’t realise would be your last cigarette would give smokers up and down the country an extra incentive to kick the habit.

Especially crass, in light of Yesterday’s shootings in Norway.

You may like to read Simon Clark’s take on it too.

And let’s not forget Dick Puddlecote

Longrider wades in a well

If you feel strongly about this hateful piece of journalism masquerading as humour you might like to send Lynn Hughes, the editor of Luton Today a quiet little missive .

It’s about time smokers were left alone. If I wrote an article in a paper that denigrated Gays, the disabled,  or Muslims, I would have the police kicking my door down and hauling me away in chains, faster than you can flick ash off a cigarette.

Stop it NOW.

Norway. The country with dignity.

Last Night’s speech by the Prime Minister of Norway.

Today Norway was hit by two shocking and bloody and cowardly attacks.
We still do not know who attacked us; much is still uncertain.
But we know that many are dead and injured.
We are all shocked at the evil that has struck us so brutally and so suddenly
This night demands much of all of us.
And the days that follow will demand even more
We are prepared to face up to this.
Norway hangs together during critical times.
We mourn our dead, we suffer with the injured, and we comfort relatives.
This is about attacks on innocent civilians, on young people at summer camp.
An attack on all of us.
I have a message to the people who attacked us, and those behind them.
This is a message from all of Norway:
You will not destroy us.
You will not destroy our democracy nor our quest for a better world.
We are a small nation, but we are a proud nation.
No one shall bomb us into silence or shoot us into silence.
Nothing will frighten us out of being Norway.
This night we will comfort each other, talk with each other, and stand together.
Tomorrow we will show the world that Norway’s democracy grows stronger when it is challenged.
We shall find the guilty and hold them responsible.
The important thing tonight is to save lives, to care for the victims and their loved ones
I would like to state my recognition for the work of the police, the medics,
and all the other people who currently do such formidable work
to help others, healing injures and saving lives.
We must never cease to stand up for our values.
We have to show that our open society can pass this test, too,
And that the answer to violence is even more democracy,
even more humanity, but never naïveté.
That is what we owe to the victims and to the those they hold dear.

A sensible and pragmatic speech.

In this country of ours, we would most likely have our Prime Minister telling us that “Lessons will be learnt”, and bombing us a raft of  further oppressive legislation.

My sympathies in this most troubling time.

THE PROMISED LAND

Over five thousand years ago Moses said to the children of Israel "pick up your shovel, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land."

Nearly 50 years ago, Harold Wilson said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a camel, this is the promised land."

Then Gordon Brown stole your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price of camels, and mortgaged the promised land.

Now David Cameron has loaned my shovel to a third World country, (he hasn't realised yet that WE are now a third World country), raised my fuel bills, lent my money to a crowd of incompetent, greedy "merchant bankers" and increased Vat to 20%.

I am so depressed last night I called the Samaritans, they diverted my call to a call centre in Pakistan . I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

Remember this Dave?

Short memory span?

The Stony Stratford martyr.

Listen to the high pitched whining sound

 

49 minutes in.

Another public service broadcast from TFE.

History of this story can be found HERE, and HERE

Verging on the ridiculous

This "Keep Off The Grass" warning sign is protecting possibly the tiniest strip of turf in London.

Residents in Elm Walk, Raynes Park, said the sign had become a "thing of great amusement" since the only vehicle big enough to park there is a unicycle.

But Labour-run Merton's highways department takes the issue so seriously it dispatched a two-strong crew to install it.

In other news.

The tiny piece of protected grass can be filed next to what is believed to be the country's shortest yellow line - 18 inches long - in Highbury Crescent, Highbury.

Makes you proud to be British.

Two women talking in Heaven

1st woman: Hi! Wanda.

2nd woman: Hi! Sylvia. How'd you die?

1st woman: I froze to death.

2nd woman: How horrible!

1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So, what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.

 

H/T to David

Slow to anger

I’ve noticed an interesting change in opinion on the Libertarian Blogosphere lately, and for that matter the populace in general. Around the time of the election the thinking was, that maybe there was hope for change and we could forget about expensesgate because we would have a government that would listen to the citizens.

At first all was well, as most people will give the benefit of doubt to a newly elected Government. This attitude has now changed as bloggers see that this government is no better than the last, and in some cases equally as useless.

It’s begun to dawn on so many people, that most politicians are only in it for the money and prestige, and couldn’t give a fuck about what the man in the street thinks or wants. Why do they not realise why voter participation is falling by the year?

What interested me last weekend, whilst I was staying at my Brother in law’s house, was how attitudes are changing in the general public. Five years ago my Brother in Law and his wife were both Guardinistas (SPIT) and embraced the liberal left consensus . Today they read the Torygraph and question that paper’s credentials as being too weak and unquestioning.

But I’d better get back to the point of this post. I’m seeing a swing in the Blogosphere away from let’s unelect them to actually having them swing from lampposts. If the blogosphere is representative of at least a small number of the populace, then there are interesting times ahead. It takes a while for the average man in the street to get riled, especially when they are subjected to the insidious output from the Brainwashing Broadcasting Corporation, but the penny will finally drop.

It amazes me how shallow our wankers betters, in the Westminster bubble, both politicians and media are more obsessed with attacking News International, than  the slightly more important  subject of a global financial melt down which could come our way in the very near future. It must be a very opaque bubble indeed.

Why don’t they realise that they will bankrupt us with utterly stupid and ruinously expensive green energy policy?  Adding more to the household bills of those who can least afford it.

Why don’t they realise that their attack on civil liberties such as the smoking ban is now fostering a smouldering hatred of those who voted for it, without thought of the consequences?

My prediction is, that in time, when the true scale of the situation becomes apparent (And it may be measured in months or years) there will be a revolution against how this country is run and it won’t be pretty. The people  of this nation have been slow to anger through the ages but when they have……………………….

What do you think?

 

 

ADVERT: Piano wire for sale. £100 per coil. Each coil suitable for three MPs. Bring your own lampost

Care home?

No  not for me.  I'll be checking  into a Holiday Inn!

With the  average cost for a nursing home care costing  £188.00 per day, there is a better way when we  get old and too feeble.

I've  already checked on reservations at the Holiday  Inn.

For a  combined long term stay discount and senior  discount, it's £59.23 per night.

Breakfast  is included, and some have happy hours in the  afternoon.

That  leaves £128.77 a day for lunch and dinner in any  restaurant we want, or room service, laundry,  gratuities and special TV  movies.

Plus,  they provide a spa, swimming pool, a workout  room, a lounge and washer-dryer,  etc.

Most  have free toothpaste and razors, and all have  free shampoo and soap.

£5 worth  of tips a day you'll have the entire staff  scrambling to help you.

They  treat you like a customer, not a  patient.

There's  a bus stop out front, and seniors ride  free.

For a  change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus  and eat at one of the nice restaurants  there.

While  you're at the airport, fly somewhere.   Otherwise, the cash keeps building  up.

It takes  months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday  Inn will take your reservation  today.

And  you're not stuck in one place forever -- you can  move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to  city.

Want to see  Scotland?  They have Holiday Inn there  too.

TV  broken?  Light bulbs need changing?  Need a  mattress replaced?  No problem.. They fix  everything, and apologize for the  inconvenience.

The Inn has a  night security person and daily room service. The maid  checks to see if you are ok.  If not, they'll  call an ambulance . . . or the  undertaker.

If you fall  and break a hip, NHS will pay for the hip, and Holiday  Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your  life.

And no worries  about visits from family. They will always be glad to  find you, and probably check in for a few days  mini-holiday.

The grandchildren  can use the pool.

What more  could I ask for? Can you see a flaw in my thinking?