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Friday 23 December 2011

Silent night

All is peaceful in the FE household tonight.

The shopping has nearly finished, although I need real lager as Mrs FE bought non alcoholic crap. That’s tomorrow’s pilgrimage.

I’m quietly sitting here writing my usual drivel whilst sipping a large whisky, and Mrs FE, son and partner are attempting a jig saw.

The open fire is just dying down, having given a gentle glow complete with flickers of light in the living room.

At this mellow moment I would like to wish all those who read this ridiculous blog a very merry Christmas. I’m quite humbled by how many visits per day I get to this blog, and my main sin is in not replying to some of the comments I receive. However some of the comments are far better than what I write in the articles. They leave me speechless. (Bloody good excuse).

Being a man of few words, I’ve found that writing articles on this blog has been a burden that I never thought I would manage. I really wish that I had the imagination and fluidity that others possess.

I’ve written articles about my early life in the marine industry and I’m considering writing about my my last few years in that industry, where I’ll try and highlight the changes for good or bad. (OMG. I’m in terminal ramble mode).

I might get a post in tomorrow, but I’ve got to pick up my niece in Southampton and brink her to chez FE.

And of course buy beer.

Have a very, very, Merry, Christmas one and all.

Especially David Wheeler. Thankyou.

The Nativity if it happened today


Thanks to W from W for this.

Quote of the year


"and then God created the orgasm, so women can moan even when they’re happy."

He’s alive.


Red-faced U.S. Air Force officials admitted today that they accidentally shot down Santa Claus' sleigh and severely injured Santa and most of the reindeer as the sleigh hovered over a field near Edwards Air Force Base in California.

"We admit the error but we that does not alleviate Mr. Claus of his own responsibility", stated Col. Jerry Gandy, 95th Air Base Wing commander.

Gandy said that Santa is allowed his yearly trek across North America under the conditions that he clearly identify his sleigh, retains radio contact with Air Force officials and remains at least 300 yards from any airports or U.S. Air Force installations.

"I radioed my coordinates well in advance and I was just outside the 300 yard perimeter", Santa stated from his hospital bed where is listed in stable condition recovering from bullet wounds, spinal damage, bruises and contusions. "I think this was a deliberate act by the U.S. Government to prevent Christmas from happening this year".

Gandy also stated that Santa's sleigh was not clearly identifiable as it had no distinguishing identification tags.

"That's ridiculous", Santa stated. "How many other damned sleighs are there out there being pulled by a pack of reindeer?"
Hospital officials say that Santa is expected to make a full recovery and veterinary officials state the same for the reindeer, except for Rudolph.

"I'm afraid Rudolph's nose was blown off", said one of the veterinarians on condition of anonymity. "We can build him a new nose but it won't have that trademark red glow".

President  Barack Obama said that he will discipline the air force officials over this outrage.
"I won’t get the Wii I asked for this year because of them", Obama stated.