As usual your host got up at the crack of dawn to prepare for the day’s festivities (At least I think 8:15 is the crack of doom dawn). Mrs FE had beaten me to it by getting up at 6:30, and when I ventured down I found her in the kitchen muttering arcane spells of the like “20 minutes to the pound and another twenty minutes…………”, and playing with strange things that purported to be vegetables. Promptly left that area of my in expertise.
I was left to stick to what I know best. The alcohol. Arranging the bottles and glasses to be ready at hand for the guests before they arrive.
Done. All is in order.
Fast forward 10 hours.
White wine lake : Empty.
Rose wine lake : Severely depleted.
Brandy: Left orbit just after the Christmas pud was finished.
Beer/lager: Red flashing warning signs signifying imminent collapse of stocks.
However all is not lost. The Whisky I hid has not been found. Yet.
What I would like to know is how do seven people drink eight bottles of white wine (includes a Grannie aged 91)? And they’re still imbibing the rum, gin, vodka, and anything else they find in my drinks cabinet.
It defies the laws of physics I tell you. I blame it on the Higgs Boson.
Bastards.
