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Tuesday 21 December 2010

The small society

Why does David Cameron keep banging on about the “Big Society”? I’m much happier with my local “Small Society”.

1. My lovely Post girl who always waves and shouts a greeting with a beaming smile which lights up my day.

2. My local shop, where the staff are polite and helpful.

3. The local Postmaster who is always cheery and nothing I post is beyond him.

4. The Milkman that delivers the milk whilst attired in shorts, even when the temperature is Minus Eight.

5. The Ditsy Blonde from down the road who pops in for a drink and has me in fits of laughter.

6. Watching the local cricket team playing badly.

7. My neighbour who feeds the cats whilst we’re away.

8.  The Bin men who run down the road but will take anything.

I Could go on but this is a small society. So sod off Dave, I don’t need you and your “Big Society” I have real Society.

Fail

The cold snap may have only just bitten but Heathrow's snow team has been working for months to ensure the UK's hub airport will once again be prepared for the onset of winter.

Hidden away in Google Cache

Lessons to be learnt?

H/T to Tim

Superheroes. No. Green Nutjobs

I found a Green Nut job site whilst trawling the internet a while ago (Ten minutes). Global warming Superheroes. Their puerile mission statement:

Your Friendly Neighborhood Climate Heroes

Spider-Man made a big deal of protecting New York from the GreenGoblin. But let’s be honest: scrapping a lycra-clad gimp on a hover-board is about as gutsy as wiping a pube from the bath.

Before you leap to old Spidey’s defense, we reckon we’re free to say what we like about him. Because we’re fighting a far greater peril…

The Earth is under threat from evil forces – a deadly combination of short-term thinking and lazy habits, and an ignorance generated by twisted minds spreading doubt about the seriousness of climate science. Damn those evil-doers.

Why they should choose to do this to our one planet, god only knows. The rest of us just want it to go on, engaged in its mysterious, rhythmic flight through its little corner of the cosmos. Seen from out there, at a distance, this place must still seem such a gift.

Yet it’s being destroyed knowingly. These super-crimes are being perpetrated by the only species capable of examining life and reflecting on its wonders. Yes, the human race understands gravity, DNA and mathematics, and is taking a stab at black holes and the Big Bang – yet some of us are clearly just still dicks.

So that’s why the Global Warming Superheroes have decided to fightback. You could say we’re like the Incredible Hulk. Now there’s a hero we can relate to: a scientist turned green and angry by a near-fatal dose of gamma rays. We too have been exposed to near-fatal doses: doses of gas from idiots denying climate science. Now we can be green and angry too.

We are, however, more patient than our monosyllabic friend. We don’t throw cars around, and our suits are still intact. Luckily our nemeses’ arguments are as wobbly as a hover-board, and one hit with the simple truth is enough to knock them back to earth.

This blog will contain all the facts you need to convince yourself which side of the fight you’re on. Still, we’re happy to stand by Hulk’s timeless warning, which gains added bite when the future of an entire planet is at stake:

“Don’t make us angry. You wouldn’t like us when we’re angry…”

As for the bit where they state “This blog contains all the facts you need……………) Well Boys and Girls. Where are they?