The swine are at it again.

Not content with the Debacle of last year’s attempt to frighten us, the politicos are at it again.

A ‘perfect storm’ of winter illness will batter Britain’s health services today.

Hospitals will be pushed to breaking point by a post-Christmas deluge of patients suffering from flu and the winter vomiting bug.*

Accident and emergency departments are bracing themselves for a surge of referrals as GP practices open for the first time after the extended bank holiday weekend.

They are also expecting high numbers of elderly patients to be brought in as they are visited by care workers for the first time in four days.

Soaring levels of both seasonal and swine flu will heap extra strain on hospitals already dealing with cases of the sickness bug norovirus, which usually peak at this time of year.

Remember last year when they predicted that thousands would die from the flue? What was the result? No more than usual.

Look you twats. Give the people the real information rather than “suggest” an outcome. What about some good news. Such as: “The Filthy Engineer has survived another festive season.”

This is scaremongering at it’s worst.

And I have been endowed with this most noble award

*Probably in my case, caused by imbibing too much of the demon drink*

Charity giving is up to me.

They never seem to be able to stop hectoring us, can they?

Cashpoint users will be encouraged to donate to charity every time they withdraw money, under Government plans to encourage a more ‘giving’ society.

Shoppers could also be asked to make donations whenever they make a purchase, on the high street or online.

As far as I’m concerned what I do with my money after the Government has reduced me to near penury, is up to me.

Mr Maude said it was a key part of Tory plans to encourage a ‘Big Society’ in which communities provide more services themselves instead of relying on central government.

As I wrote in a previous post, I don’t want to be part of your “Big Society”. I just want to be left alone from the “Nudge” policy being used by those in power over us.

Where’s all this charity money going to go I wonder? Most likely to those Taxpayer funded fake charities such as ASH who just like to make my life a misery.

On a personal note.

Just Fuck Off and leave me alone.

Kill the kids early

Last night I struggled through the snow to keep the spongers my children in booze. Most of them and their hangers-on's  fiancées, husbands, etc, left before I could shame them into contributing to FE’s retirement fund.

However the hard core rump were perturbed that the wine lake was empty. Ok, being a stupid generous father, I braved the elements and visited the local wine vendor to stock up for these parasites family members.

What have they done this evening? Left the wine to die of old age and hit the Vodka, Rum, and  whisky.

I despair.

Moral of the story: Have a vasectomy at the age of about ten.

Think of the Cheeldren

Bloody Locusts Children emptied the cellars of all the alcohol that FE bought for Christmas. Considering that FE bought £ 278 of booze on the thursday before Christmas, that’s some going. They’ve just had the cheek to complain about the lack of stock.

So FE has been forced to trudge through the snowdrifts to the local alcohol retailer and buy the following:

Vodka x 2

Wine (White) x 4

Beer. 24 bottles.

Rum x 1

I’m keeping my coat on as I expect that I’ll have to repeat the journey.

Think of the Cheeeeeldren. Bah humbug.

Oh (Rein)Deer

 

Next time look where you’re going you bearded old fool.

Just think of the Cheeeeeldren.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Yes. Justice has been done.

Remember the case where a woman was thrown bodily into a cell and injured. Remember how the Officer was charged but won his appeal.

However he has been dismissed from the Police. Good result I think. At least someone is sane.

Wilts custody sergeant sacked.

How will Santa get here now?

Bah Humbug

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The small society

Why does David Cameron keep banging on about the “Big Society”? I’m much happier with my local “Small Society”.

1. My lovely Post girl who always waves and shouts a greeting with a beaming smile which lights up my day.

2. My local shop, where the staff are polite and helpful.

3. The local Postmaster who is always cheery and nothing I post is beyond him.

4. The Milkman that delivers the milk whilst attired in shorts, even when the temperature is Minus Eight.

5. The Ditsy Blonde from down the road who pops in for a drink and has me in fits of laughter.

6. Watching the local cricket team playing badly.

7. My neighbour who feeds the cats whilst we’re away.

8.  The Bin men who run down the road but will take anything.

I Could go on but this is a small society. So sod off Dave, I don’t need you and your “Big Society” I have real Society.

Fail

The cold snap may have only just bitten but Heathrow's snow team has been working for months to ensure the UK's hub airport will once again be prepared for the onset of winter.

Hidden away in Google Cache

Lessons to be learnt?

H/T to Tim

Superheroes. No. Green Nutjobs

I found a Green Nut job site whilst trawling the internet a while ago (Ten minutes). Global warming Superheroes. Their puerile mission statement:

Your Friendly Neighborhood Climate Heroes

Spider-Man made a big deal of protecting New York from the GreenGoblin. But let’s be honest: scrapping a lycra-clad gimp on a hover-board is about as gutsy as wiping a pube from the bath.

Before you leap to old Spidey’s defense, we reckon we’re free to say what we like about him. Because we’re fighting a far greater peril…

The Earth is under threat from evil forces – a deadly combination of short-term thinking and lazy habits, and an ignorance generated by twisted minds spreading doubt about the seriousness of climate science. Damn those evil-doers.

Why they should choose to do this to our one planet, god only knows. The rest of us just want it to go on, engaged in its mysterious, rhythmic flight through its little corner of the cosmos. Seen from out there, at a distance, this place must still seem such a gift.

Yet it’s being destroyed knowingly. These super-crimes are being perpetrated by the only species capable of examining life and reflecting on its wonders. Yes, the human race understands gravity, DNA and mathematics, and is taking a stab at black holes and the Big Bang – yet some of us are clearly just still dicks.

So that’s why the Global Warming Superheroes have decided to fightback. You could say we’re like the Incredible Hulk. Now there’s a hero we can relate to: a scientist turned green and angry by a near-fatal dose of gamma rays. We too have been exposed to near-fatal doses: doses of gas from idiots denying climate science. Now we can be green and angry too.

We are, however, more patient than our monosyllabic friend. We don’t throw cars around, and our suits are still intact. Luckily our nemeses’ arguments are as wobbly as a hover-board, and one hit with the simple truth is enough to knock them back to earth.

This blog will contain all the facts you need to convince yourself which side of the fight you’re on. Still, we’re happy to stand by Hulk’s timeless warning, which gains added bite when the future of an entire planet is at stake:

“Don’t make us angry. You wouldn’t like us when we’re angry…”

As for the bit where they state “This blog contains all the facts you need……………) Well Boys and Girls. Where are they?