Twas the night before Christmas.

Merry Christmas to you all.

Have a merry Christmas

 

I will now. The presents are finally wrapped.

It’s a quiet night

The family descended en masse to FE towers today. Myself and Mrs FE were up at the crack of dawn (Oh yes really), to prepare lunch, sort out glasses, and clean out and light the fire. By eleven all the family had mustered in an orderly fashion and you would think that everything was set for a fine dining repast. WRONG. We had no holly for the christmas pud. After much discussion (About 30 seconds), it was decided to send out a search party to search for said elusive berry. After trudging for some time we were all suffering from severe dehydration and were forced to seek comfort at a local hostelry.

The host of this blog was advised that we would play a game to decide who was going to pay for the lifesaving liquid refreshment, quaintly called beer. We would play Pewl pool. This involved hitting a white ball with a pointy stick, and trying to hit a yellow ball or a red ball. Woe betide you if you hit a blackball with the number eight on it. I lost.

For all our ventures in finding the shrub with the red berries in our troubled search, on returning home your FE was informed that he was incompetent as the said plant grows in his garden. (BUGGER, found out).

Lunch went well. No one suffered from projectile vomiting, so mrs FE must have done something right for a change. (Now I’m really in the shit).

Now is the winter of our content. (Shakespeare).

I’m now posting this in an alcoholic, mellow mood. (Thank god fot htr splee cheker).

I’ll try and be more erudite tomorrow.

If you’re lucky.

Oh (Rein)Deer

 

Next time look where you’re going you bearded old fool.

Just think of the Cheeeeeldren.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Ah Christmas.

Let’s have a little song.

H/T to Sue

My House

Not.

I like the music though. Can anyone tell me what the piece is?

All is quiet

My wine lake is nearly empty. I've been drunk out of house and home.

I expect that, that fake charity, Alcahol concern, to be hammering on my door tommorrow. Bollocks to them.

Not only that, I'm not sure the car will make it under the weight of empties, to the bottle bank.

Ah, Christmas.

All is well in FE's household. Apart from the favourite niece having to be cooked a medicinal bacon and egg sarnie this morning to cure her hangover, all has gone well. Lunch has been consumed with copious quantities of alcohol, presents exchanged, and now everyone is dozing off whilst watching a typical xmas movie.

FE is imbibing a very fine Calvados and is feeling very mellow at the moment.

Merry Christmas to one and all.

And finally. A song that says it all

My favourite carol.



H/T to Subrosa

A merry Christmas to one and all

This Blogger wishes you all a very Merry Christmas. Normal service will be resumed when the festivities are over and I have sobered up enough to use a keyboard. *Hic*.

And a bit of rude humour.

Christmas music.

Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy.

Dear Santa

Could I have the following?

1) A sit on snowplough. I'm really pissed off, digging my drive out each morning.

2) A money printing machine. I'll need it in the new year. If the Government can have one, why can't I?

3) A two year old. My wife has trouble programming the sky box to record. (And NO, I'm not a paedophile).

4) One of your Reindeer to butcher, as I might not be able to collect the Turkey if the snow continues. Surely you don't need all of them?

5) Inspiration in the new year. Blogging is oh so difficult.

6) Al Gore's head on a plate. (To go with the Reindeer steaks).

7) If you pass Leg Iron's place first. Could you nick all his single malts and drop them off here?

8) Oh and can I have that Partridge in that pear tree? Never had partridge.

Thankyou, you fat git

Yours

FE

Oh, and some Carbon credits would be nice.