My past life.

43 years, man and boy. It’s a pity there are so few ships left. When I joined there were over 60.

Incidentally when I left, I was the longest serving person ever to have served in the RFA.

Still. The pension is good.

PS. The sister ship to the Wave Knight, the Wave Ruler, was the last one I sailed in.

A sad little movie

Here is a ship that I first served on in 1976, going to an ignominious end. I joined her when she was relatively new and working out of Portland Naval Base for The Flag Officer Sea Training (FOST). We were tasked to train the succession of ships undertaking Basic Operational Sea Training (BOST), in Replenishment At Sea (RAS).

These evolutions  are carried out at very close quarters with both the supplying ship and the receiving ship steaming at 12 Knots (Approximately 15 MPH).The evolutions consisted of liquid replenishment, diesel fuel. aviation fuel, and potable water. Then there is solid replenishment by heavy jackstay, and personnel transfer by light jackstay.

It’s a pity to see the old girl go like this. She served the country well.

RIP RFA Grey Rover.

Mind you I’ll probably be shaving with part of her before long

Engineering as it used to be–part 7.

I left my reader (Hi Christopher) some months ago, hanging on with bated breath. Here is the next episode in the saga of engineering and debauchery at it’s finest. (I might just leave out most of the engineering bit).*

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin.

For those of a non technical bent, look away now.

On sailing from Singapore, which was a relief because my funds were severely in the red, we set off for a visit to the land of the rising sun. Japan.

What I was not expecting was that my boss had volunteered me to do an exchange with one of the accompanying warships (I’m showing my age here. It was a “Battle” class destroyer). I would transfer over in exchange for one of their midshipmen. Of course this would be done at sea whilst we were underway, by means of a jackstay transfer.

This involved passing a rope between the two ships travelling at speed and then being hauled across by a bunch of tossers who thought nothing of relaxing the jackstay enough to allow yours truly to be partially immersed in the South China Sea. Bastards. (I can say that cos it’s my blog). These days transfers are usually carried out by helicopter as H&S has virally infected our armed forces.(I’m surprised that they are even allowed to shoot the Taliban).

One thing that never ceases to amaze me was their choice of sleeping quarters for me. A camp bed in the radio room. On an RFA vessel the only people permitted entrance were those that had Top Secret clearance or above and positively vetted, (it was another 15 years before I obtained that level of clearance, due to the fact that I had to work round those big nasty things that went bang and emitted a large mushroom cloud).

Next came disillusionment. Being a callow youth and believing everything I’d been told, I thought that I would live the life of a naval officer. Swanning around, practicing a plummy accent, and drinking copious quantities of pink gin in the wardroom (Bar).

Not so. I was to attend the midnight to four watch in the boiler room. Bugger. A quick briefing ensued, where it was explained to TFE that naval boiler rooms had a different set of rules. Let me explain. In the RFA they had a perfectly reasonable way of getting air into the boilers to aid combustion of the fuel. You use a fan to feed air directly into the furnace. Made sense to me. Not so in Her Majesty’s Royal navy.

Their idea was to pressurise the entire boiler room. As explained to me, if I was to enter the boiler room and endanger this pressurisation, the flames in the furnace would leap out and engulf all.

So the boiler room had an airlock system that you had to enter by. With a safety feature being that the outer door had a switch that turned on a light in the airlock. When this light illuminated then it was safe to enter the boiler room.

Ten to midnight loomed. After struggling to find my way I arrived at the first door and opened it with trepidation. Not knowing my way around, for all I knew, I might have found an outside toilet. The next paragraph shows that I may have needed one.

I’m in the airlock. I close the outer door. Oh fuck, I’m still in pitch darkness. Try again. Nope. (Twenty times later), Expecting to be engulfed by the fires of hell, I inch open the inner door. To my surprise there was no agonising flaming death.

All  I found was that the boiler room crew (laughing hysterically I saw), had deliberately unscrewed the light bulb. Bastards.

An interesting aside. The following day I was informed that I’d be  on one of the dog watches. I was somewhat taken aback by that statement. Yes, my last ship had a cat. But the navy kept dogs onboard? That really intrigued me. Was I to spend the time cleaning out the kennels of attack alsatians used to repel boarders, or were they Officers’ pets? I was wrong. Oh well.

*Fooled you. this post was always going to be about the engineering (Or lack of it). Next post. Japan.

One day i might even let you know about my bit part as a submariner. That was fun. Especially the toilets.

Operation Taurus

This was my last ship before retiring. It certainly was a memorable trip. The Video below only gives the last half of the deployment, the first half where all the real hard work was done is not shown. You will notice in the video that an Arleigh Burke destroyer crops up from time to time. This was because there was no area defence destroyer from our Navy, available at the time. So we borrowed an American one for the duration.

The Wave Ruler was one of the newest additions to the RFA (Royal Fleet  Auxiliary), and was state of the art when it came to machinery. Even the accommodation was of a high standard, all cabins being single berth with en-suite.

Propulsion was Diesel electric with four 4.7 Mw diesel generators with an output voltage of 6.6kV driving two Motors attached to the shaft. Manoeuvrability was enhanced by bow and stern lateral thrusters all controlled by a semi dynamic positioning system. (Cool Eh).

State of the art reverse osmosis plants were fitted for the production of potable water (my babies), capable of producing nearly 200,000 litres per day.

Anyway enough of the nuts and bolts. Lets get down and personal.

My trip started with a flight to Crete to join the Ruler for the trip out to the Far east. We duly departed from there and commenced a Suez canal transit and headed into the Indian Ocean. A few days on Anti Piracy patrol was the ship’s first tasking, though nothing came of it. Next a little jaunt for the task group across the Indian ocean to rendezvous with the Indian navy and a few days of joint exercises ensued.

However we had more than the Indian Navy on our Menu. A dash round India to the other side ensued to meet up with the Bangladeshi Navy and more fun and games that navies’ love.

Where next? Ah yes Singapore.

Just a short, enjoyable stay there,  to pick up Mail, stores, spares, and top up with Fuel, and then we were of to exercise once more. This time with the Malaysian Navy. More of the same. Then back to Singapore and the journey home as portrayed in the Video.

I could go on, but won’t.

My time was up when the vessel reached Gibraltar, where I had my retirement bash in the Waterfront restaurant. I then flew into retirement and haven’t looked back since.

I don’t miss my time in the RFA (43 years) although in the early years, fun and work, were on equal par with one another. However in the final years the regime of Elf and Safetee, smoking regulations, alcohol restrictions and numerous other restrictions to the affable life of the past convinced me that it was time to go. So I did.

Engineering as it used to be Part 5. Continued

Now where was I………………………………..?

Oh yes I was in the boiler room. It has been pointed out in the comments that I haven’t given a good description of the properties of superheated steam. Most of us think of steam as the wispy stuff emanating from the spout of the kettle. Wrong. The wispy bit is actually water vapour condensing from steam. It’s the bit you can’t see close to the spout that is steam. 

Pure steam is a transparent gas. At standard temperature and pressure, pure steam (unmixed with air, but in equilibrium with liquid water) occupies about 1,600 times the volume of an equal mass of liquid water. In the atmosphere, the partial pressure of water is much lower than 1 atm, therefore gaseous water can exist at temperatures much lower than 100 °C (212 °F) (see water vapour and humidity).

In the above paragraph you’ll note that you can’t see real steam.

The one thing that may save your life is your hearing. Superheated steam at 600 psi (41 bar) and at a temperature of 800 deg F (426 deg C), makes a noise when it is issuing from a small hole or leaking gland. As I said in my last post don’t believe that noise is a drunken motorman whistling. Another valuable aid involves a piece of stick and a captured sea gull. *Now you really think I’m losing my marbles*  It’s really quite simple. Take one feather, attach it to the stick, hold stick in front of you, and when the feather magically disappears you know the rough vicinity of the steam leak.

Technical bit over for now.

Damn. Lost my train of thought.

Anyway the ship set sail for an exotic location. So I thought. I was wrong. Instead we sail across the Indian Ocean till we nearly hit Africa. Then we stopped. What was our purpose you ask? We were to maintain a blockade of the Rhodesian (Zimbabwe)  port of Beira to stop the import of fuel to the then, white Government of Ian Smith who had declared unilateral independence.

All in all we spent months of that coast. Sometimes at a crawl up the coast, sometimes drifting, even sometimes going in large circles just to break the monotony. Occasionally we would meet up with other ships in the task force and competitive sports would be played. deck Hockey being one of them. All to win that most coveted prize. “The Beira Bucket” (Mentioned in my last post).

The trophy for these sporting activities was a battered old metal bucket which at the end of each sporting contest was hung triumphantly from the winning ship’s yardarm. Now housed in the Portsmouth Naval Museum it remains as a reminder to crews and naval personnel of those Indian Ocean patrols in the years 1966 to 1971.

Decorated with ships names and crests, the bent and battered Beira Bucket is an unusual reminder of those years in the Mozambique Channel, and has been the subject of a number of fond reunions in the past years.

After months of patrol I would happily have kicked the sodding thing over the side.

*Technical stuff alert*. Look away now if you hate technology.

The one thing that I had plenty of time do though, was to actually find out how all this strange machinery worked. Right we’ve had the steam in all it’s forms bit so I’ll give you and idea what to do with it.  First it would meander it’s way through large, lagged pipes until it arrived at the throttles in the engine room. (Think huge tap) . The two throttles, one for forward and one for backwards (Even ships need a reverse gear. Especially if someone shouts out “Iceberg ahead”), were controlled by what looked like large steering wheels.

An actual picture of the control station of The Tidereach

The steam (superheated type) would then whiz over and into the turbine which is made up of steam injection nozzles and rows and rows of  rings with blades on them. Pretty much the same as a modern jet engine.

 

Of course this turbine would spin at several thousand RPM which is not a very practical speed to turn a ships propeller. A bit akin to permanent wheel spin. So just like a car you need a gearbox to achieve an output speed somewhere in the region of 100 RPM.

Whilst all this is going on all that steam wizzing out of the boilers causes the water levels to drop therefore it needs to be replenished. This is where those handy little items, condensers and feed pumps come in. The steam leaving the turbine is no longer superheated, as it has given up much of it’s energy to produce motion, and is now a saturated vapour. This vapour is cooled in the condenser by sea water(Plenty of that. The volume of the oceans and their seas is nearly 1.5 × 109 [sic] cubic kilometers"), and then pumped back into the boilers.

Now you know as much as me about steam engineering. After all I’m qualified as a Motor Engineer.

Are you bored yet?

Next time on Lost Fe’s adventures at sea will be Sembewang, voyage on a destroyer, a broken light bulb (You think I’m joking. Oh No), Japan, and  Ladies of the night, and Portland harbour.

Mind you I might just blog about the local elections or the Royal wedding. Your choice. You have been warned. Don’t blame me if it ends in tears.

Good does not mean expensive.

In relation to my last post about the expensive MRA4 debacle, I cannot understand why we always seem to go for expensive weapons systems suited for the cold war, that has been over for some time.

Now I was at sea for a considerable number of years and saw a tendency for the ordering  of very expensive high tech warships but few in number. The problem as I see it, is that those ships cannot patrol all our vested interests. To give you an example we had one Frigate/Destroyer and a support Tanker in the Caribbean undergoing counter drug operations, disaster relief, and protection for our Dependencies. We had another small warship in the Falklands along with a support tanker.

Now we have one minor war vessel in the Falklands, most of the time no warship in the Caribbean, and one support tanker trying to cover both areas.

In the past after the Falklands conflict we normally had a Type 21 Frigate and a cheap and cheerful Rover class tanker in each area of operation.

This gets me to  the point I would like to make. Why don’t we either build/buy some cheap and cheerful frigates armed with a gun on the front, a point defence missile system, and a reasonable anti submarine detection system.

Another idea would be to build more “Wave Class” Auxiliary Oilers (AO) which have proved themselves in the Caribbean by the very fact that with their fuel capacity, their facility to carry a Law Enforcement Detachment  Team from the US coastguard, Helicopter, weapons, etc, they have become a range extender for the coalition in the fight against drugs. (Incidentally I was on an AO out in the Caribbean, where we intercepted 32 Tonnes of Cocaine being shipped to Europe). Present armament Two 30mm powered mounts, two Mk 48 miniguns, and five GPMGs. Plus active decoy systems, ECM, and ESM. Plus the provision to fit CIWS phalanx.

Pic is of a minigun.

Armament could be enhanced by buying something like THIS. That would be quite sufficient.

Lets think numbers, rather mine’s bigger than yours.

And don’t get me started on Eurofighter Typhoon.

The difference a year makes.

Last year in May. I was working on a ship.

The ship was on anti piracy patrol of Somalia before heading out to the far East.

Pros:

30 deg C and blue seas.

Earning Oodles of Money.

Cons:

No smoking inside. Only a small area at the aft end of the ship to smoke.

H & S going mad. If you work for the government they take it to the nth degree.

Every 4th day being duty engineer for 24 hours. At the beck and call of a computerised monitoring system.

An alcohol limit that would have Don Shenker cheering from the touchline.

An Engine room temperature of 40 deg C.

Gunnery practice. That's the smoking deck out of bounds.

Training. Have you ever tried to explain to the average sailor why a fire drill is a good thing?

Frigates that want fuel at 0600. Can't they wait till after breakfast?

Frigates that want fuel at 2100. Can't they wait till tommorrow.

No mobile phone signal.

No access to the internet.

This year in may. I'm retired.

Pros:

Smoke where I want.

Drink what I want, when I want.

My rules.

Not a ship in sight.

Cons:

Less money. Enough for my simple needs though.

The weather.

The Wife.

The Lynn Rival update

I wrote some while ago about my thoughts on how the RFA Wave Knight failed to prevent the capture of the Chandlers. It would seem that the pirates have lowered their sights and are now demanding a lesser ransom. Down from $7 million to $2 million. There are those now saying the ransom should be paid . Read it here.

No, No, No. That would just encourage anyone to think that hostage taking was a lucrative business.

I think that the majority of those writing in the comments agree with me on this one.

However it would never have happened in the first place if equipment in the vid below had been allowed to be used.

Privatisation of the Royal Fleet Auxiliary?

I have just retired from the RFA and consider this a very bad idea. The article in the Times a few days ago spells it out. However although it may save money it will weaken our defence.

This paragraph would on the surface make sense:

The MoD is also considering outsourcing the management of the RFA fleet. This could be given the go-ahead as part of a review into the RFA fleet or it could be introduced solely for the six new vessels. Several groups including James Fisher, the UK’s largest ship broker, Maersk, Serco and VT Group are understood to be interested in managing such a contract.

And this is what these companies will try to bamboozle the government to allow:

More money could be saved if the RFA followed standard commercial practice and hired foreign crew members.

Yes they could do that, but it would be a disaster in many ways.

1) Security: RFA seafarers are vetted to a minimum of "Secret" clearance. (Yours truly is vetted to "Atomic Secret"). How would they be able to vet foreign Nationals. Which ally would work with this level of uncertainty?

2) Training: The average commercial company trains their personnel in basic firefighting. Probably 1/2 hour per week.

RFA training is in advanced firefighting, damage control, Nuclear warfare, chemical warfare, biological warfare, operation of the weapon systems (Yes the ships are armed), Secure communications, Replenishment at sea (Very close manoeuvring of two or more vessels, which would make the average commercial Captain have a heart attack), and many more drills. These are ongoing and extremely thorough. Each ship also has to undergo a gruelling evaluation period on a regular basis which exercises all these parameters. Can you imagine a commercial outfit, costing and training for that?

3) Turnover of personnel: RFA personnel are intensely loyal. They are not just in it for the job. For most it is a vocation.

I could go on, but I'll let readers decide for themselves if privatisation is a good thing or not.

We really are going to Hell in a Handcart under this Government.

Source for the Times article is here.

44 years in the Royal Fleet Auxiliary, Part 3.

When I left you last time I was just about to land in Singapore.

Now for a young lad whose only experience of foreign travel was a single holiday in France, this was an astounding experience in the difference between West and East.

Firstly, the weather, hot and humid, like nothing I'd ever imagined.

Secondly, the smell. Fragrant plant smells with a coupcon of open drain.

Thirdly, everyone was smaller than me.

I'd been told that I would be met by the "Agent", whoever he was. Surprise surprise, I was met by a very polite Chinese Gentleman who informed that the ship hadn't arrived and that he would convey me to a hotel.

The hotel was one of those old colonial buildings of which many were built in the time when Great Britain ruled most of the world. Lofty, large, airy, and truly amazing compared with the average british house.

Anyway back to the tale of this young Engineer cadet..................

The following morning, after a truly amazing breakfast of Nasi Goreng, the agent returned to take me to my ship. The RFA Retainer. (Pictured above).

The Retainer was an ammunition stores ship which carried a variety of those very stores that make very loud bangs when they're angry. Even the biggest known to man. (still covered by the Official Secrets Act, so I'm being discrete here).

Armament Store Issuing Ships. RFA Retainer. A329. (Ex Chungking). GRT 9498. Built 1950. RFA service 1955 - 1979.
Length overall: 477ft. Beam: 62ft. Draught: 25ft. Depth: 35ft.
Machinery: 1 X 6-cylinder Scotts'/Doxford diesel engine, 6500bhp, single shaft. Speed: 15 knots.
Complement: 132 RFA, 34 naval stores staff.

Anyway. having walked up the brow I was sent to see the Second Engineer who would be like a God to me. The power of authority on ships in those days was truly immense. After being suitably humbled as to my lowly state in the heirarchy, I was shown to my cabin. A rabbit hutch that I had to share with another cadet.

That's enough for now. Next episode will be about............................. Doxfords. Maybe.

44 years in the Royal Fleet Auxiliary.

Now some of you might think that is quite a long time to work for one company. As I will explain in a later post it became too much to continue and stay sane.

Imagine if you can, it is the Year of our Lord, Nineteen hundred and sixty five. Time 0900, 13th september, Venue, Poplar Technical college. (Anyone who started on that date also has my commiserations).

Here I was, a callow youth, about to depart on a career that I really knew nothing about. Except that ships and engines would be involved. I was an Engineer Cadet, decked out in my smart new blazer with the company badge on the breast pocket. Anyway that induction day passed in a turmoil of having the Syllabus explained, tour of the college, numerous form filling (Even then there was paperwork), buying stationary in the shop, and a myriad of other things that I can't remember (I did warn you that it was 44 years ago). I had arrived in the adult world.

Mind you the subjects I was going to have to learn sounded a touch disconcerting.

Applied mechanics: I thought they worked on cars
Applied heat: Mmm, I'm going to learn to use matches
Electrotechnology: Wiring up plugs?
Engineering drawing: Oh bother. Knew I should have paid more attention in art.
Chemistry: Why?

Anyway, that was day one.

Two years on.............................................

If you have Filthy Engineer HD+ installed on your blog, set it now to receive the rest of this Oscar winning series.

I'm glad I retired from The Royal Fleet Auxiliary

I used to work as a marine engineer with this outfit till last month.

On October 28, 2009, the armed Royal Fleet Auxiliary tanker Wave Knight met Somali pirates transferring the British couple Paul and Rachel Chandler from their yacht Lynn Rival to a hijacked Singaporean container vessel.

Hostage: Rachel Chandler and her Somali captors. The British couple has made a direct plea on video warning UK authorities they fear the 'kidnappers are losing patience' and may kill them

When warning shots from Wave Knight failed to deter the pirates, its 100-strong crew stood by and did . . . absolutely nothing.

The obsession with Health and Safety, Political correctness, and all the trapping of this modern world were stifling initiative. On the spot decisions were discouraged. Risk assessments, permits to work, Cossh regulations, preps for firing chits, etc. All these precluded prompt action.

Read the whole article here and weep.

Oh, and there was a two year argument, on whether ring bolts on the upper deck should be painted grey or white.

Grey argument: Must paint grey to prevent the enemy spotting us.
Counter argument: Radar has been in existence since WW2

White argument: Will prevent sailors stubbing their toes
Counter argument: Why don't they look where they're going

Homeward Bound

The time has come to set off for the shores of the UK. Since I last posted we have sailed over the Indian Ocean, through the Bay of bengal, transitted the Straits of mallacca and out into the South China sea. Was it worth it you might ask?

No it was bloody hard work with endless days at sea, sometimes going around in circles as dictated by the Task group Commander, an utter waste of time. All to show the flag to our old colonies, whom I suspect, didn't give a damn whether we were there or not.

To describe how the mighty are fallen, we berthed on one of three berths in Singapore that are leased for the Brits, Yanks, Aussies, and NZ navies in Sembawang. When I first joined a ship in this, that was a premier NAVAL base, we OWNED all of it. We had at least thirty ships stationed there. At the rate our politicians are going, we will be lucky to have thirty ships in our entire navy.

Still, why should I care, I'm retiring after this trip?

But I do.