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Thursday 29 September 2011

Worry?

Worried about losing your job?

Worried about the fall of the value of your savings due to inflation?

Worried about your investments dropping through the stock market floor?

Worried that you can’t afford to heat your home this winter, AND eat?

Worried that you’re going to fry due to Global Warming? (No actually. I just put that in to placate the warmists).

Worried that the nation can’t defend itself due to the defence cuts?

These pale into insignificance if you’re the PRIME MINISTER of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE FROM PLASTIC BAGS, FFS.

plastic bags

Britain’s biggest supermarkets are today given an ultimatum by the Prime Minister: Radically reduce  the number of plastic bags you hand out by choice, or I will force you to by law.

I was going to call him an idiot, but that would be a slur on idiots. He is below idiot level. (Is a cretin lower than an idiot?)

The Prime Minister says it is ‘unacceptable’ that the number of single-use carrier bags rose last year by 333million – a 5 per cent increase from the previous year. Environmental campaigners say the bags, used for only 20 minutes on average, take up to 1,000 years to degrade.

Well I for one, applaud the carrier bag manufacturers for increasing their sales by 5%. I sure other businesses would love that growth.

Who says that carrier bags are only used once? Where do they get those figures? I for one use the same carrier bag many times whilst trudging up to the local shop to replenish the whisky stocks. (Without which, this post would not be written. You can’t really believe the drivel I write on this blog can be done sober, can you?).

Who knows that they can last 1,000 years? Are there teams of archaeologists digging up old Roman carrier bags, whilst we speak? When is the exhibition going to be held in the British museum? Are we going to see a 500 year old plastic bag going for mega bucks on the antiques road show?

Mr Camermong. You should be trying to run the country, not sucking up to the Daily Mail, and trying to garner votes from those of a so called green persuasion.

TWAT.

* Trudges of into the other room to pour out another whisky*

21 comments:

  1. We are already short of bags for the waste bin. Any more cutbacks and we will have to buy them.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes I use mine in the kitchen bin. So after the booze shopping they get a final use.

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  3. Bags left in the conservatory, so subject to heat and sunshine, decay in under five years. Another made up statistic then?

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  4. Tesco bags are so crap they barely last in one piece before I get home. They also ration them.

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  5. plastic bags are so freaking thin and flimsy now I have to double bag my whisky.

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  6. Are they not recyclable? So what is the problem?

    ReplyDelete
  7. The arch enemy of plastic bags is Prince Charles. This loathsome creep overlooks the fact that his "Duchy Original" sausages (only £327.95 for a pack of six) are wrapped in non-reusable plastic. C**t.

    ReplyDelete
  8. awww...microdicked, global warming profiteering, dictatorial pansies. I hates them my precious..I HATES them.
    The world would be a better place without them..unfortunately they don't have the manners and good graces to drink the arsenic laced kool aid and leave the rest of us alone.

    ReplyDelete
  9. And if Cameramong had any sense he'd have looked into this in more detail and found that where it's been done, South Australia for instance, people have ended up buying plastic bags for the bin instead of using the supermarket freebies they used to get for nothing. Oh, and they're thicker plastic that takes even longer to break down in landfills than carrier bags do, on top of which the bag for life replacements are more energy intensive to produce and ship so they save nothing until they've been used a couple of hundred times or so.

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  10. Hey, FE, Go easy on the boy, this is the only thing left the EUSSR will let him legislate on.

    John.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I can't for the life of me remember where .. but I've read that plastic supermarket type bags can be re-cycled & turned into Fleeces for colder weather wear ..

    Like others, I re-use my plastic bags several times before finally binning them ..

    And if they're worried about where to put them after binning .. there's always the Chunnel .. and thousands of miles of empty mining tunels in Wales, Yorkshire, Nottinghamshire etc just sitting there doing nowt ..

    The country is in shit order .. the economy is in shit order .. yet all the Camermong can bleat on about is sodding plastic bags ..

    Give me fucking strength !

    ReplyDelete
  12. A quick search yielded the following:

    Cretin.... IQ 70-85

    Moron ....IQ 55-70

    Imbecile..IQ 40-55

    Idiot.......IQ under 40

    I am unable to verify any of these, other than to say my brother was classified as a moron and was capable of doing simple work competently if supervised. I wouldn't trust anyone in parliament to do anything worthwhile, supervised or not.

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  13. Has anyone noticed that this was the favourite band wagon that our last Prime minister used to ride on?

    Why is that?

    Couldn't be the European Union by any chance?

    ReplyDelete
  14. "my brother was classified as a moron" ..

    Isn't Tom Cruise one also ?

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  15. quote > "my brother was classified as a moron" ..

    Isn't Tom Cruise one also ? < quote

    No, I believe Tom Cruise is a follower of the Church of Scientology; should you wish to expand that to suit your opinion, is, of course, entirely up to you.

    There are still some of us who don't judge a person by his religious beliefs, as there are those who do not ridicule the unfortunate.

    Perhaps you should consider becoming one.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Tesco bags are biodegradable so if they start charging for them I'll sue the cunts under the trade descriprion acts and the other one tht says stuff has to be fit for purpose.

    ReplyDelete
  17. "and the other one tht says stuff has to be fit for purpose" ...

    I think you mean the Sale of Goods Act 1982, Banned ..

    ReplyDelete
  18. I agree with Banned, Tesco's and other shops supply bags which are degradable, I don't know about the Bio bit as several that have been used for storing things in my garage for a few years have disintegrated when I attempted to pick them up. They were very brittle and fell into little pieces which caused much swearing as they were so light it was a bastard trying to sweep them up. Despite many adverse comments I think that nice Mr Cameron is a jolly good fellow, I especially admire the way he stands up for our interests against the EU, oh, I have to go now as my padded cell is ready and I have to take more of those nice purple tablets they give me.

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  19. DRATSAB.

    "I have to take more of those nice purple tablets they give me."

    Got any to spare?

    ReplyDelete
  20. M&S started charging for them a few years back in NI. I havent shopped there since.
    Great business by M&S.

    ReplyDelete
  21. If a shop charges for a carrier bag and you really do need one, make sure to turn it inside out so you aren't paying to advertise for the b'stards. My other favourite one is just to walk out and leave all the un-paid for/ but checked out goods lying at the cash point. This is an excellent way of dieting and saving money. Besides, the cost of carrier bags are factored in to the price of the goods. And look at the rip-off prices Marks & Sparks charge.

    ReplyDelete

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