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Tuesday, 19 June 2012

Light blogging

Over the next few weeks, for a number of reasons, this blogger may post less on this blog. (Not that you care, I suspect).

1. One of my daughters gave me on Father’s day, a genealogy software package. I intend to use the three months subscription free package, to it’s full usage. (I’m a tight git).

2. I have to fly to Munich next weekend for a stag do. That’s the weekend blogging done for.

3. In less than three weeks I’ve (forcibly*) to attend my eldest daughters wedding. Of course I will be phoned at every instance and expected to sort out other’s cock ups. However the worst is that I’ve got to make a speech. So far I’ve not managed to get very far with it.

This is as far as I’ve got:

Ladies and Gentlemen - You will all be pleased to learn that my speech will be every bit as good as the last wedding speech I gave. In fact, my side of the family will probably remember great chunks of it! Not really, although I am following exactly the same format. This means it will probably start off badly, sag in the middle with long silences, and then trail off into a lot of incoherent rambling.

Weddings are a marvellous excuse for a big party, and today is no exception. We have a lot of people here today – grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends… and a handful of people I recognize. Thank you all for coming.

The worst bit is that I’ll have to remember it. Could I do death by PowerPoint instead, or is that unacceptable?

So you see, I’ve the whole world on my shoulders.

Working out when everyone dies.

Drinking to excess.

And spouting drivel. (Mind you, considering that the cost of this wedding could bail out Spain, twice). If any of you can send me some pithy father of the bride speech material, I will be eternally grateful. (Well maybe).

What do you think?

* In the Chav vernacular. Luv hr to bitz.


  1. Are you being invited to your son in law's stag do, or is it a different one?

  2. Lol. At least you seem to have a good relationship with your daughter, my own father would be privileged to get an invite to my wedding.

    Enjoy, relax and say what you feel is the only advice I can give. Wish them the best and don't be too long with the speech. Google may be your god with the material, though!

  3. Fly to Munich for a stag do!!!! How the other half lives. ;-)

  4. You could be using this as a template:-

    Best wishes and lang may yer lum reek.

  5. Slightly off track but when my nephew got married his speech was to his in-laws and all he said was "Thank you for cocieving"


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