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Thursday, 9 June 2011

Latest News Stories

Jonathan Ross has been accused of shoplifting a kitchen utensil from Tesco. Ross says it was a whisk he was prepared to take.

Police stop a Pakistani in his transit van on the motorway. Policeman says "Do you know the limit is 70?". The driver leans into the back and says "hear that - 3 of you have got to get out".

4 Illegal immigrants suffocated in the back of a Tesco lorry last night. Every little helps.

Paddy & Mick stagger out of the zoo with blood pouring from them. "Bollocks to that", said Paddy, "That's the last time I go lion dancing"

63 Pakistanis died in Bradford this morning. It was not a terrorist attack, a bunk bed collapsed. The police are blaming AL IKEA .

Scientists have revealed today that they have found a new drug for depressed lesbians. It's called Trydixagain.

1 comment:

  1. Fucking hilarious! Can't beat Pakki jokes :)


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