I hate……….

BRITISH HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2 0 5 0

My predictions.

Ozone created  by electric cars now killing millions.

White minorities still trying to  have English recognised as the UK 's
third language.

Children from  two-parent, married, heterosexual families bullied in
schools for being  'different'. Tolerance urged.

Manchester schoolgirl expelled for not  wearing a Burqa.

Japan announces that they will no longer consume whale  meat as whales are now extinct, and the scientific research fleet are  unemployed.

UK Government has told the Japanese that Grey Squirrels  taste like
whale meat.

Britain now has ten Universities of Political  Correctness.
Professor Goldman of LSPC says there is still a long way to go  in the
fight to stop people saying what they think.

Britain's deficit  £10 trillion and rising. Government declares return
to surplus in 100years which is 300 years ahead of time.

Prime Minister Mohammed Yousuf claims increased growth through more immigration is the secret to success.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Iran  still isolated. Physicists estimate at least ten more years
before  radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help  after being taken over by Islamic
Countries.
No other country comes  forward.

Jose Manuel Rodrigez Bush says he will run for second term as  US
President in 2052.

Post Office raises price of stamps to £19 and  reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

After a ten-year, £75.8  billion study commissioned by the Labour
Party, scientists prove diet and  exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of a British male  drops to 18 stone.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates  their civil and
human rights. Victims to be held partly responsible for  crime.

Average height of professional basketball players is now nine  feet,
seven inches.

New law requires that all nail clippers,  screwdrivers, fly swatters
and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by  January 2051 as lethal weapons.

Inland Revenue sets lowest tax rate in  decades at 75 per cent.

Bradford  win FA Cup Final, beating Hindu  Hornets 4-1.

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN

(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.

Telekinesis made fun

If it saves one child. Etc, Etc,Etc.

 

You know how the righteous use that phrase to try and ban everything.

Firstly, I'd like to know who this one child is that keeps getting its life saved. It's either enormously lucky, or a stupid little toe-rag.

Probably the latter – it does keep getting into these scrapes that it has to be rescued from. If someone can let me know the little *******'s name and address, I'll undertake to go round and put it permanently out of our misery.

All is not what it seems

There is an elephant in the room sky.

Dumbos.

Apparently this was uploaded by the street artist “Banksy”.

So this is why………..

they have wind farms.

I’m mean they are useless at producing energy when you need it.

Little Cheyne court (In Kent) is at this moment producing 290 kW. The rated capacity is 59.8 MW. Or less than half of one percent of the rated capacity. Try the interactive map if you’re not convinced of the uselessness of these follies..

When are the politicians of all colours going to wake up and realise that they’ve been taken for a bunch of fools?

Why did the………..?

Greentards.

They should have thought about the consequences first. But then green idealists think that everyone lives in the same fluffy bunny world as them.

Greenpeace crew members detained in Russian jails for two months over their open-sea protest against Arctic oil drilling are "close to shock" over their conditions, a rights activist said Tuesday.

And poor dears.

The activists have complained of cold cells and a lack of suitable clothing and food, said Irina Paikacheva, the head of a state-connected regional prisoners' rights watchdog.

And as a smoker that is being denormalised by the state I laughed till I was nearly too out of breath to have a smoke.

Several non-smoking activists also complain of being placed in cells with chain-smokers.

But more crap here.

A young Finnish female activist is a vegan and unable to eat prison food, Paikacheva said, adding that prison officials had denied her request for vitamins to be delivered to her.

Being a vegan is a choice not a necessity in life

Under Russian law, prisoners have to hand in their watches and wear shoes without laces. The Finnish activist lacks a thyroid gland and needs to take medicine regularly -- hard to do without a watch.

Utter bollocks. My son has no thyroid. He just has to take one tablet in the morning, and one in the evening.
Pampered twats, the lot of them. The rest of us live in the real world,

Thirst