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They’re campaigning hard.

My local councillors are trying very hard to get my vote in the council elections.

Are they buggery.

In fact the only sign of any campaigning is a pamphlet from UKIP. I think that the big parties seem to think that they’ve either got my vote (Tory), or don’t stand a chance of getting my vote (Labour, Libdem). This really pisses me off. In fact I’ve never, in the 25 years that I’ve lived at this address, ever actually had a politician knock on my door and try to persuade me to vote for them. (Lazy presumptive bastards, the lot of them).

So, I shall be voting Ukip. At least they made some sort of effort, not like the other parties that just presume how I’ll be voting.

Ukip will be the conservatives downfall.

Sorry.

I couldn’t resist this one on the eve of the council elections tomorrow.

Tech Tips.

Some of these may be helpful.

The illusion of choice.

 

Not much difference there then.

Hazadous liquid.

On reaching into the cupboard under the sink for some washing up liquid, what do I find?

Have a guess.

You guessed wrong.

Why should half a bottle of red wine be there?

Mrs FE was at a loss to explain. Mind you the glazed eyes gave it away, along with the slurred speech.

Women!

Toiling in the mens’ room.

And the ladies room for that matter. Toilets in FE towers are unisex. I wouldn’t like to be classed as anti feminist.

Let me cut to the chase, though you’ll wish I hadn’t.

There was one of those little jobs that I have been meaning to get around to for some weeks. Fixing the downstairs Loo. (Toilet for those who are not used to colloquial English).

The problem with this porcelain edifice was that it was failing to flush without handling the flushing lever like a demented person who has been affected by Sarin nerve gas. (Topical).

Now my cistern is of the type that has a little silver handle on the front, that when activated, empties the contents in one fell swoop into the toilet bowl. Thus flushing the accrued detritus away in one foul swoop. (Hah).

Amazingly when I interrogated the web site of a well known purveyor of DIY items (Starts with a “B” & ends with a “Q”), nowhere could I find a simple, one flush mechanism. They seem to think that we all want a duel flush system. Having had to unblock the bathroom toilet on boxing day two years ago has turned me off from these spawns of  Satan.

However another well known DIY store (Begins with “Home”) actually had what I needed.

Bye now your thinking that I’m going to tell you some tale of woe as the post about my plumbing exploits I regaled you with. Far from it. I sailed through the replacement without a hitch.

What I did not realise is the built in obsolescence of the water lifting diaphragm on both the old mechanism and the new. A piece of plastic sheet less than the thickness of a carrier bag. If I’d known this before the replacement, I would have repaired the old mechanism with a piece of plastic sheet from a heavy duty bin bag.

I won’t be caught twice.

You can got to sleep now.

Kindness

What comes around, goes around.

Don’t complain.

 

Plain packaging?

It seems a health minister by the name of Anna Soubry has let the cat out of the bag about plain packaging of cigarettes being introduced this year. I find this indefensible, in that the consultation details have not been released yet. But it would seem that they don’t care.

Ministers are to introduce plain packaging for cigarettes along the Australian model with legislation this year, after becoming convinced that the branding is a key factor in why young people start to smoke.

The legislation, to be announced in the Queen's speech in May, is also expected to ban smoking in cars carrying anyone aged under 16 years. Ministers acknowledge that the ban is likely to be difficult for the police to enforce, but they believe peer group pressure will have an impact similar to the ban on drivers using mobile phones.

Here is Godfrey Bloom’s (MEP)  thoughts on the subject.

 

We really are governed by a shower of wankers.

Here are DP’s thoughts

And Simon Clark’s.