Arrivederci Roma

Your Italian correspondent is now back from Rome refreshed and broke.

Rome. Wow, what a city. Vibrant, noisy, but oh so full of cultural heritage. And bloody expensive. How an earth,  a glass of beer can cost 4 Euros is beyond me?

If you haven't been there, and you don't mind being reduced to pauper status then you should visit it even once in your life.

Pic: The Trevi Fountain.

If you think that the vuvuzela racket in the last  world cup was noisy, then you will be astounded by the racket produced by the million scooters passing per second, by day and by night. This is then followed every two minutes or so by the chiming of the Ice cream vans Ambulances, picking up the bodies of the scooter riders, culled by the taxis.

Pedestrian crossings are an interesting experience. In the UK you stand at one, and the traffic will stop and let you cross. In Rome if you just stand there, you will die of old age. The strategy is to take your life in your own hands and just walk across and trust in any God (Or just plain lady luck). Funnily enough it works well, although disconcerting at first.

Just in case my kids and and their partners are reading this after racking up my bar bill in my hotel to unimaginable levels. You have drunk your inheritance.

Post card from Italy.

Weather glorious. 35 deg C.

Beer cold.

Food good.

What’s more to be said.

Your Italian correspondent signing out. next update will be from Rome.

And on a lighter note

Muslim of the year

Bound to be on the Fatwa hotlist now.

I'm glad I'm not a tour operator.

I was tasked with booking flights and hotels to a wedding venue in Italy. What a nightmare. Trying to get all the relevant info from all the different parties is like getting blood out of Mount Everest. Still, I suppose it's worth it.

The good news is that I wont be posting absolute drivel on this blog for ten days. (mind you, I have packed my emergency laptop).

The bad news is that in ten days, I'LL BE BACK. Posting drivel on this blog.

So they have made up their tiny little minds.

You remember that gimmicky website, where we were all exhorted to post up which laws we would like to have repealed or amended.

One of the most populated areas was the smoking section with dozens of topics calling for an amendment to the law. And hundreds of comments.

You probably guessed it already. They are just ignoring it

 

In other words it was just more spin to make us think that they are better than labour.

Cunts.

Guns.

 

In light of the hysteria by some of the populace such as "Mothers against Guns" after the recent spate of killings. Here is an amusing little interview.

One of the smartest replys' on gun phobia to date !! ....
For those who don't know him, Major General Peter Cosgrove is an 'Australian treasure!'

General Cosgrove was interviewed on the radio recently.
You'll love his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children. Regardless of how you feel about gun laws you've got to love this! This is one of the best comeback lines of all time. It is a portion of an ABC interview between a female broadcaster and General Cosgrove who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military headquarters.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
So, General Cosgrove, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?

GENERAL COSGROVE:
We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?

GENERAL COSGROVE:

I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?

GENERAL COSGROVE:
I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
But you're equipping them to become violent killers.

GENERAL COSGROVE:
Well, Ma'am, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you?

The radio went silent.

And the final sad fairy tale. (Maybe)

Sleeping beauty and her Prince.

You were supposed to give her a kiss, you twat.

A fairy tale Hoody

Little Red Riding Hood leaving Grannie's Maccy D franchise.

Fat Chav.

Terror stalks the Land.

 

The BBC has informed me tonight that I'm in mortal peril. This dragon, meteor strike, plague, heatwave is going to kill millions. So they would like you to believe. FFS I've worked in temperatures of 50 deg C with no ill effects. Just a few sensible precautions are needed such as plenty of fluids, keep out of direct sun where possible, wear loose fitting clothing, and shock horror, increase your salt intake. (The health police are so going to get me for that last one).

The BEEB have even plastered the NHS direct number over their TV weather charts. No doubt if you ring it, stating you feel a bit hot and sweaty, they'll probably suggest you have a swine flue jab.

So chill out folks. Flash up the barbie and have a few cold beers.

*I'm taking the precaution of adding ice to my whisky.

This sad ending to a fishy tale

The Little Mermaid

Sushi sashimi, Yum