Listen to the high pitched whining sound
49 minutes in.
Another public service broadcast from TFE.
Thursday, 21 July 2011
Verging on the ridiculous
This "Keep Off The Grass" warning sign is protecting possibly the tiniest strip of turf in London.
Residents in Elm Walk, Raynes Park, said the sign had become a "thing of great amusement" since the only vehicle big enough to park there is a unicycle.
But Labour-run Merton's highways department takes the issue so seriously it dispatched a two-strong crew to install it.
In other news.
The tiny piece of protected grass can be filed next to what is believed to be the country's shortest yellow line - 18 inches long - in Highbury Crescent, Highbury.
Makes you proud to be British.
Two women talking in Heaven
1st woman: Hi! Wanda.
2nd woman: Hi! Sylvia. How'd you die?
1st woman: I froze to death.
2nd woman: How horrible!
1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?
2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.
1st woman: So, what happened?
2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.
1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.
H/T to David
Wednesday, 20 July 2011
Slow to anger
I’ve noticed an interesting change in opinion on the Libertarian Blogosphere lately, and for that matter the populace in general. Around the time of the election the thinking was, that maybe there was hope for change and we could forget about expensesgate because we would have a government that would listen to the citizens.
At first all was well, as most people will give the benefit of doubt to a newly elected Government. This attitude has now changed as bloggers see that this government is no better than the last, and in some cases equally as useless.
It’s begun to dawn on so many people, that most politicians are only in it for the money and prestige, and couldn’t give a fuck about what the man in the street thinks or wants. Why do they not realise why voter participation is falling by the year?
What interested me last weekend, whilst I was staying at my Brother in law’s house, was how attitudes are changing in the general public. Five years ago my Brother in Law and his wife were both Guardinistas (SPIT) and embraced the liberal left consensus . Today they read the Torygraph and question that paper’s credentials as being too weak and unquestioning.
But I’d better get back to the point of this post. I’m seeing a swing in the Blogosphere away from let’s unelect them to actually having them swing from lampposts. If the blogosphere is representative of at least a small number of the populace, then there are interesting times ahead. It takes a while for the average man in the street to get riled, especially when they are subjected to the insidious output from the Brainwashing Broadcasting Corporation, but the penny will finally drop.
It amazes me how shallow our wankers betters, in the Westminster bubble, both politicians and media are more obsessed with attacking News International, than the slightly more important subject of a global financial melt down which could come our way in the very near future. It must be a very opaque bubble indeed.
Why don’t they realise that they will bankrupt us with utterly stupid and ruinously expensive green energy policy? Adding more to the household bills of those who can least afford it.
Why don’t they realise that their attack on civil liberties such as the smoking ban is now fostering a smouldering hatred of those who voted for it, without thought of the consequences?
My prediction is, that in time, when the true scale of the situation becomes apparent (And it may be measured in months or years) there will be a revolution against how this country is run and it won’t be pretty. The people of this nation have been slow to anger through the ages but when they have……………………….
What do you think?
ADVERT: Piano wire for sale. £100 per coil. Each coil suitable for three MPs. Bring your own lampost
Care home?
No not for me. I'll be checking into a Holiday Inn!
With the average cost for a nursing home care costing £188.00 per day, there is a better way when we get old and too feeble.
I've already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn.
For a combined long term stay discount and senior discount, it's £59.23 per night.
Breakfast is included, and some have happy hours in the afternoon.
That leaves £128.77 a day for lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies.
Plus, they provide a spa, swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc.
Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.
£5 worth of tips a day you'll have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
They treat you like a customer, not a patient.
There's a bus stop out front, and seniors ride free.
For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there.
While you're at the airport, fly somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.
It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take your reservation today.
And you're not stuck in one place forever -- you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city.
Want to see Scotland? They have Holiday Inn there too.
TV broken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No problem.. They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.
The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid checks to see if you are ok. If not, they'll call an ambulance . . . or the undertaker.
If you fall and break a hip, NHS will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.
And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-holiday.
The grandchildren can use the pool.
What more could I ask for? Can you see a flaw in my thinking?
Stony Stratford–The end?
Well maybe. But I’ll be waiting to see if councillor Bartlett tries again on September 20th.
Councillor Paul Bartlett's smoking ban proposals were the main item on the agenda last night at the Stony Stratford Town Council meeting.
Members of the public were invited to speak on the matter before the proposals were voted on by the Town Council.
Councillor Paul Bartlett's motions were later rejected by the Town Council. Nobody present was prepared to second either of the two motions that were on the agenda for the meeting. As a result, the proposals were discarded and did not need to be debated on further by the Town Council.
The whole article is HERE.
H/T to Mr Puddlecote
Tuesday, 19 July 2011
Don’t drink and fly.
Take one drunken redkneck and one light aircraft………………………………………..
All is not as it seems. Damn good piloting though. Watch till the end.
H/T to David Wheeler.
Monday, 18 July 2011
Gggrrrrrh
Even my council is trying to scare me with climate change.
SEA levels in Sheerness are rising, according to a report by environmental bodies, leading a conservation group to warn of an increasing flood risk.
A report entitled London's Environment Revealed, said the sea level at the mouth of the Thames Estuary in Sheerness is rising at a rate of 1.5mm a year.
Further on they report.
The report said: "Climate change is likely to increase mean sea levels, increase peak surge tide levels and increase wave heights. Rising sea level has the potential to increase flood risk."
If they’re that concerned why do they use the word “Likely” (My embolden)? If they’re that sure then why not use the word “will”?
Then of course it is some of the usual suspects.
The study – commissioned by the Environment Agency, Natural England, the Forestry Commission and the Mayor of London's office.
But then of course they miss the bloody obvious.
Much of Sheerness as well as Sheppey is below sea-level and so is prone to flooding. You can find references to this as far back as Samuel Pepys, when he was responsible for dockyards and was choosing sites to defend the Thames. Parts of the current sea wall around Sheerness was built following the 1978 floods.
1377-99
King Richard II ordered coastal defences to be built on the Island.
1953
Flooding did great damage to Sheppey, seawall has to be rebuilt at Cheyne Rock and heightened along its 2 mile length.
1978
Island cut off from mainland by snow and floods. And again in 1979 with floods.
However they end up ruining their own argument
The spokesman said: "This is showing us that the defences are still providing a standard of protection to a 0.5 per cent chance of flooding in any given year in the Sheerness area.
We’re all doomed I say.
*Then again, I live on the opposite side of the county*
A brilliant Idea!
Have you been one of those passengers that’s found that your airline has overbooked and there is no seat for you?
Here's a solution to all the controversy over full-body scanners at the
airports, and which may get you a seat on the aircraft.
All we need to do is develop a booth that you can step into that will not
X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have hidden on or
in your body. The explosion will be contained within the sealed booth.
This would be a win-win for everyone. There would be none of this crap
about racial profiling and the device would eliminate long and expensive
trials.
This is so simple that it's brilliant. I can see it now: you're in the
airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter an
announcement comes over the PA system, "Attention, standby passengers! We
now have a seat available on flight number..."
Where’s Lord Sugar when you need him?
* Ok the pic at the top is a little OTT, but hey the idea is what counts*
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