While hiking along the white cliffs of Dover this morning I noticed a Muslim extremist slip from the cliffs and fall into the English Channel .
He was struggling to stay afloat because of all the explosives he had been carrying.
If he didn't get help he'd surely drown.
Being a responsible Brit, and abiding by the law of the land that requires you to help those in distress, I informed Kent Police and the Home Office.
It is now 4 p.m., he has drowned, and neither authority has yet responded.
I'm starting to think I wasted two stamps.