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Wednesday 8 September 2010

It’s now a fact. I am an idiot.

Test for Idiocy

Below are four (4 ) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately . OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are....

Ready? GO!!!

First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?

Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
Absolutely wrong!

If you overtake the second person, you take his place, so you are second! Try not to screw up next time.

Now answer the second question,
But don't take as much time as you took for the first one, OK ?
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?

Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?

You're not very good at this, are you?
Third Question:
Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.

Take 1000 and add 40 to it.. Now add another 1000. Now add 30.  Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. Now add 10. What is the total?

Did you get 5000?
The correct answer is actually 4100.

If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator!
Today is definitely not your day, is it?
Maybe you'll get the last question right....

....Maybe.

Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the ! Name of the fifth daughter?

Did you Answer Nunu?
NO!
Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again!

Okay, now the bonus round:

A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.

Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?

He just has to open his mouth and ask...
It's really very simple.... Like you!

Multi Quangocrat fired over Election Fiasco.

It’s about time they fired this lefty “Quangoqueen”.

Jenny watson

Jenny Watson is to be told by ministers her tenure as a board member of the Audit Commission, the local authority spending watchdog, will not be renewed.

Mind you they should have sacked her from her day job as well.

The 46-year-old, who was dubbed the 'Modern Militant' thanks to her work at a string of quangos under Labour, earns £100,000 a year as head of the elections watchdog, the Electoral Commission.

It would seem that she is a a leader in her field at sucking on the public teat. She certainly has it down to a fine art.

Electoral Commission

Audit Commission

Bin quango “Wrap”

Equal opportunity’s commission.

Victim Support

The Fawcett Society.

She’s certainly got around.

A song for Bob Crow

Slightly very sweary

Makes the point though.

H/T to Angry Teen