I’m alive.

Sorry for not posting for a while but I caught a cold. May I add, no ordinary cold.

This cold (caught from a grandchild) has had me laid low for the last couple of weeks. One day I’d start to feel better, the next day I’d feel worse. It’s been a case of having one of those nagging headaches that makes you run screaming from a computer screen. It’ was also the case that just trying to get to bed caused me to almost collapse on the bed because my lungs refused to play ball. For some perverse reason they seemed to reject the food of life, Oxygen.

The only remedy that settled my fevered brow was not high strength anti- biotics , but Leggie’s tonic. Whisky.

I must say that after a couple of weeks of non blogging, it’s quite difficult to get back into the swing of it. Then again when you get to my age, everything takes time.

It’s going to be cold and expensive.

It would seem that not only are we desperately short of gas reserves, but in the medium term we are going to be screwed on our energy bills.

Britain's gas reserves could run out in 36 hours – leaving the country dependent on costly foreign imports.

The UK’s gas stores have less than two days’ supplies remaining after plunging temperatures forced millions of householders to turn up their heating.

And today there were warnings from energy giant SSE of the 'very real risk' of the lights going out in Britain.

With more snow forecast today and the unseasonable freeze to continue into next week, the UK could be left relying on expensive imports from Norway through an under-sea pipeline.

The shortfall is likely to push up the long-term price of gas and could result in household tariffs rising by up to 15 per cent before next winter, adding more than £200 on to family bills, analysts warned.

After having horrendous energy bills for the last twelve months I decided this year to change supplier and opt for a fixed tariff. I was actually quite surprised that the actual charge per kWh on this new tariff is actually less than I was paying last year. Definitely win win. (Smugly smirks).

Even if the supplies do get cut off, I’ve invested in a sizeable stockpile of coal and logs for the open fireplace in the living room. At least I’ll be able to keep the house from freezing entirely.

What bugs me is, if I can work it out, why can’t DECC with it’s huge departmental budget, not see this coming? If the power does go off  we should be calling for the Ministers’ heads on a plate and the disbandment of the entire department.

Fuck me. I’ve just seen an entire squadron of pigs do a flyby over my house.

Ring Ring.

And no it’s not my niece.

Me: (Gingerly picks up the phone as it is a number I don’t recognise) Hello?

Caller: Is that Mr FE?

Me: Speaking.

Caller: I hope you are well today (Why that should be any concern of there’s I don’t know).

Me: Well I’m suffering from the winter lurgy and hope this doesn’t get passed down the phone line to you (Smiles).

Caller: (Pause) Sorry to hear that but I’m interested if you'd be interested in our home energy improvements.

Next follows a pre-prepared script about the energy savings that could be obtained.

Me: Ok. Tell me more.

Caller: We can get a grant to help you install our loft installation.

Me: Great. Can you supply me with a loft to go with it? (I have a three story house which has no loft) 

Caller: (Long pause). You have no loft?

Me: Nope.

Caller: Ok. Can we interest you in cavity wall insulation?

Me: So you want to destroy the integrity of the structure of my house?

Caller: Not at all Sir.

Me: Explain why I should inject a substance that will negate the whole idea that a cavity wall is there to prevent damp passing from the exterior to the inside.?

Caller: (Longer pause).

Me: Don’t worry, I haven’t any cavity walls anyway..

Caller: (Now realising is he’s lost, tries one last gambit), Can we interest you in solar panels?.

Me: (By now I’ve lost the will to live) No. Unless you can guarantee me free power for twenty years with no expense to me.

Caller: Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, (Rings off)

Oop north

as most of my readers know, I live in the sunny south of England. However I’m now visiting my son in the North of the country. on the way up, Mrs FE and myself were quite shocked at so many areas were underwater to some depth.

Today we visited that fine old city of York to do some early Christmas shopping in the St Nicholas Christmas market fair. It didn’t bode well from the beginning when we boarded the train from Darlington to York, and discovered it was packed to the Gunwhales (seafaring term for chockerblock), due to delays in the trains caused by the flooding.

On arriving in York we were met by icy cold winds and this blogger was quite happy to suggest to Mrs FE that she desperately needed to look in various shops for gifts. Just so he could retreat from the cold.

After some hours of shopping I think we were all glad to go back to my son’s house. But I was wondering if I would suffer the same fate as the day before.

On arrival at my son’s house on the,Thursday evening, the boy stated that the boiler wasn’t working as it had tipped out on low water pressure, and would i just top it up as he was going to make us tea.

Dead simple in practise. Not this bloody time. On opening it up a plastic fitting blew apart and ended up soaking yours truly with freezing water before I managed to close the valve. The plastic fitting was resecured but the next problem was that the endlessly butchered valve was found to be impossible to open.

Now by this time FE is not only cold but also wet and thought it imperative that we source a new valve from the local DIY superstore. And this we did. Having arrived back at the son’s place, fitted the new valve, shivering by now, I instructed my son to switch on the boiler.

FAULT F5.

Now most people would be reaching for the phone by now, but fortunately this problem is known and can be easily rectified. The problem is a sticky air flap valve. Solution is to break out the hairdryer strategically kept under the stairs and aim it for a few minutes at the offending area of the boiler. boiler will roar into life. Prayers of thanks my now be said.

The moral of this rambling post (fuelled by the famous grouse cheaper whisky, is that modern houses cannot exist without central heating as they usually have no means of heating without it.

So at least those of you who don’t have a fireplace go out and buy yourself a fan heater or two. especially as most pundits are predicting a cold winter this year.

Where’s that bloody Global Warming got to?

Climate "Change" again! A cold wind blows.

It seems there is some shift in the media over climate change. Both the Telegraph and the Mail are running a similar story about Global cooling rather than Global warming.

From the Telegraph:

The world could be in for a spell of cooler temperatures, rather than hotter conditions, as a result of cyclical changes in ocean currents for the next 20 or 30 years, it is predicted.

Research by Professor Mojib Latif, one of the world's leading climate modellers, questions the widely held view that global temperatures will rise rapidly over the coming years.

And from the Mail:

Britain's big freeze is the start of a worldwide trend towards colder weather that seriously challenges global warming theories, eminent scientists claimed yesterday.

The world has entered a 'cold mode' which is likely to bring a global dip in temperatures which will last for 20 to 30 years, they say.

Nothing new from BBC /Pravda though. Just this:

Scientists have uncovered what appears to be a further dramatic increase in the leakage of methane gas that is seeping from the Arctic seabed.

Methane is about 20 times more potent than CO2 in trapping solar heat.

Oh well. I wasn't expecting a breakthrough. The bear looks bemused though.

Colder

An interesting website showing the underlying cooling that has been going on over the last decade. Lots of interesting links to a plethora of articles.

The article is here. Nicely set out and simple to read.

H/T to EU Referendum