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Wednesday, 26 November 2014

I never want to……

hear or see the following:

“It’s for the sake of the Children”

“Lessons will be learnt”. (It should read: The fuckwit in charge, has been hanged sacked immediately).

No smoking.

“Drinkaware” on my booze. ( I’m perfectly aware how much I need to drink before I’m a gibbering wreck).

“It’s the right think to do”. (The head fuckwit politician’s favourite phrase).

“Darling, can you fix the……”(Enter disaster of your choice).

“Ring Ring” We’re just carrying out a short survey. (After twenty boring minutes you finally find out what they’re selling).

I could probably think of many more if I wanted to.

Please add your pet hates in the comments.

19 comments:

  1. Fight the cuts.
    No platform to UKIP.
    No privatisation of the NHS.
    We're going to change the terms of membership.
    Celebrating diversity.
    Iconic.
    Centre of excellence.
    The Roma have been persecuted for centuries.
    Black history month.
    Islamophobia.
    Homophobia.
    Lad culture.
    I apologise unreservedly.
    I made a mistake with my expense claim.
    The far right EDL.
    Right wing blogger.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This one gets my teeth ratting,

    "Now you don't smoke anymore, when are you going to give up vaping?"

    Well, I'm not!

    ReplyDelete
  3. The innocent have nothing to fear
    We need to have a debate about this

    ReplyDelete
  4. I feel your pain.

    ReplyDelete
  5. The debate is over.

    Going forward

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Can I get....?"

    ReplyDelete
  7. 97 per cent of scientists . . . .
    The report is robust, peer-reviewed . . . .
    The BBC has learned . . .

    ReplyDelete
  8. "Your call is important to us,,,, "
    But we're too tight to employ more answerers

    ReplyDelete
  9. Corporate buzzwords. All of them.
    Our company has recently discovered buzzspeak and is loving it.

    Leverage
    Buy in
    Leadership team
    Values
    Robust
    Etc...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Raising Awareness

    ReplyDelete
  11. Heads up
    Step up to the plate
    Huddle (informal meeting)
    Ball park figure
    Informed choices
    End game
    Vibrant
    Diverse
    Customers (when it should be 'passengers')
    Issues (when it should be 'problems')
    Healthy eating
    Inappropriate
    Unacceptable
    No platform
    Carbon footprint
    Climate change

    ReplyDelete
  12. deficit? What deficit?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Experts have said...
    Sustainable development
    We are an equal opportunities employer
    Most smokers want to quit, and these bans help them
    If smokers switched to e-cigs, it would save 5,000,000 lives a year

    Actually, I could go on and on.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Contro-versy (Yankee mangling) instead of the perfectly fine English con-troversy

    ReplyDelete
  15. It is right that...
    Proactive
    Right wing
    Left wing

    ReplyDelete
  16. Progressive
    Socially liberal

    (both of which tend to mean pretty much the exact opposite)

    ReplyDelete

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