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Monday 1 August 2011

The recession has hit everybody really hard...

My neighbour got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

Wives are having s*x with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.

CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with coins while she danced.

I saw a Mormon with only one wife.

If the bank returns your cheque marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Kensington fired their nannies and learned their children's names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

A truckload of British were caught sneaking into Ethiopia.

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

5 comments:

  1. The economy is so bad, I went to my bank the other day and the cashier handed me a note saying, "This is a robbery!"

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Wives are having s*x with their husbands because they can't afford batteries."

    Husbands are having s*x with their wives because they can't afford to go on the prowl.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "I saw a Mormon with only one wife."

    Donny Osmond?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Captain Haddock1 August 2011 at 18:52

    And the First Sea Lord now has his office in the rowing boat hire shed at the Serpentine ..

    ReplyDelete
  5. Is Donny Osmond not dead? If he's not he should be!

    ReplyDelete

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