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Sunday, 10 October 2010

I’m helping 10:10

Right. This morning I decided to help those folks out with their Global warming malarkey.

Lets see.

  1. Central Heating on and set to 25 deg            Check
  2. Windows open                                               Check
  3. Oven on, and door open                                Check
  4. Fire lit                                                            Check
  5. Car started and left running                           Check
  6. 300w security lights on                                  Check
  7. Immersion heater on and bath left running with plug out                                                                 Check
  8. Shower on                                                      Check
  9. Mower running and left tethered to run in a circle. (Note to self.Remember to top up fuel tank) Check
  10. All lights on                                                     Check


There you are 10:10. Ten items to increase my global warming signature.

What’s that you say? I’m supposed to cut my carbon footprint? Oh dear, I must have misheard you. Ok I’ll leave the TV on standby then, and not watch it. And bye the way, my electricity meter caught fire due to the speed it was turning and the house burnt down. A bit of smoke never harmed anyone.

And the  crash of that airbus 380 can’t be pinned on me for burning oily rags on the open fire. Can it? I admit that the visibility was a bit limited, but really just because the buggers circle over my house before landing at Gatwick can’t be my fault surely.

I’ll get it right next year. (Promise)

*Fingers crossed behind my back*


  1. One is confused by your 'humming' comment...

  2. I did something similar today. But then I am an awkward sod. In the days when I used to smoke, I would wait for National No Smoking Day and take both cigarettes and a pipe to work, and smoke them alternately.

    Good post.

  3. I trust you also had the 500 and 1000w spotlights pointing at the solar panels and the fans pointing at the wind turbines to obtain the offsets and subsidies?

  4. Or just wire the turbines to the mains so that the elctricity goes straight back to the grid. You pay the normal unit rate, and get it back ten times over as a 'green' feed-in tariff. It's been done.


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